I can't feel the meter when playing along very well, sometimes not at all.
Note I can feel the "pulse" just fine. I have no problem tapping my foot to the beat in time but I can't feel where the one is in many cases unless it is easy or involves a simple rhythmic pattern. Usually syncopations or melodies that obscure the meter throw me off.
The issue seems to be that I can't really keep track of the meter and also perform what I'm trying to play. I do not have a huge issue counting the meter or tapping my foot hard soft soft soft for quadruple meter. Although, in some cases I do get a little lost if the beat is obscured or heavily syncopated as I want to re-adjust how I am counting. For example, there is a drum fill that plays only the "&"'s between two sections with nothing making the meter obvious I'll tend to hear the "&"'s as the one... this makes it almost impossible to perform a lick over it because I'll come in a half beat too early or late.
One of the biggest problems this presents, and seems to be a huge roadblock on ability is that I have difficulty knowing when to come in or when to resolve a phrase so it lands on the 1st beat correctly.
Again, realize that I can play some things just fine. For example, Say I learn a 16 bar solo note for note and it's mostly a steady continuous pattern. If there is a part that I do not learn exactly and try to make my own thing up there is a big chance I will either add or remove too many notes so that I'll not end the solo properly and get off. If the solo has some space between phrases I also can loose track unless I do have to play anything and can count. I can, for example, come in on the "&" of 1 or the 2nd beat pretty easily if I can focus on that(sometimes I can feel it but not usually).
I think this problem ends up presenting another issue with slows me down. If I learn a solo but has a memory lapse and forget a bar of it then I'm screwed as I can't usually recover(sometimes but rarely). What will happen is I will be completely lost or end up being out of sync(but in time, I have no problem with timing itself, I can play along with a metronome well, I can tap my foot to the pulse or division of the pulse no problem, just can't feel the hard/soft beats well).
Most of this stuff applies to "single" note melodies/solo's or stuff like that but not strumming. I usually don't have a huge problem with strumming chords, I guess because it's much easier to do in general(just chord shapes).
I also should add that if there is no real sense of pulse(something supplying the meter) I generally am lost as I can't "count" and play at the same time(which is the real issue). I basically have a lot of difficultly multi-tasking. Anyone have any ways to get me over this hurdle?