Much has been said about the idea of a musical style. We can group composers of similar places and times together (e.g. the "Classical" style in Vienna), discuss groups of jazz musicians and how they improvised (e.g. bebop players), and even define a composer's individual style, as these SE people have done with Prokofiev.
When it comes to my own writing as a composer, however, I am at a loss. Lately I've been having a sort of composer's mid-life-crisis. I write and share things, and sometimes hear feedback like "this doesn't sound like you," or worse "this sounds like you're trying to compose like xyz composer." But it has all led me to this question.
As a composer, how do I define my own musical style? And, if I do indeed have my own style, how do I grow and develop into a more mature composer without writing in a new style?